Our Sunday’s are usually packed with no time to breathe. The day begins for my husband at 5:00 am and for me at around 6:00-6:30 am. My little girl’s sleep time is usually disturbed, once we get ready to go to church we dress the little one while she is fast asleep! She usually starts crying and then she sleeps, it feels bad but we have no option. We leave home by 7:15 am and are at church by 7:30, since my husband is very passionate about his commitment to church!
By the time church is over, its 9:30 and we spend sometime catching up with our church members. Yesterday, we wanted to visit my mother in law just after church because we were going to be busy the rest of the day. We were hurrying up to leave church and my daughter dint want to come along, she wanted her aunt that is my sister whom she calls “chitthi”! We couldn’t help because we were running out of time, we pulled her along and she began crying. We tried to pacify her and we awfully failed. Her cries couldn’t be stopped, it was quite jarring and both of us as parents took turns – when one was trying to shout at her, the other tried to tell her lovingly but she wouldn’t listen!
We had reached my mother in laws house, she dint want to walk up to the house, she dint want to come to me since I was the one who was shouting at her. She clung to her dad and she dint even want to enter the house. Somehow we managed to bring her in – my mother in law offered her a lot of good things and she asked her if wanted chocolates, fruits, or juice or cashew nuts or mixture or and or and the list kept going.. But her only answer to all the questions was – she wanted chitthi!! Well, We tried our best but she kept crying so we decided to move on we left my mother in laws house in maybe 15 minutes and obviously it wasn’t a good feeling for my mother in law nor for us!
On our way back, she was still crying and crying, it was too difficult to take. I had to literally beat her up to stop her crying because its been more than an hour she was simply crying and crying! After I did beat her, she stopped crying and was fast asleep by the time we reached home. But I was so hurt within me, how could I beat up my child and it was not a good feeling at all! It was so hard for me, but that was the only option left to me.
This is not the first time this incident happened, but every-time I go through something like this – It reminds me of our relationship with God our Father!! How many times we are stubborn with “OUR WILL” to have “OUR OWN WAY” but keep singing “Have Thine Own Way Lord”!! My daughter was asking for something she dint know anything about, she was not willing to understand she was too young and cranky because she was sleepy and her routine got disturbed! But we despite our understanding and knowledge still do the same!! Isn’t it true that we all pray every day “May your Will be DONE as it is in Heaven” and do exactly the opposite?? We are usually asking God Why? Why me? Why this problem?? We do not see the whole beautiful plan God has in our lives, we just want something that makes our lives simple! But do we really get onto our knees to ask God to help us desire HIS WILL in our lives?? And when God wants us to learn, he definitely disciplines us and that’s why the Psalmist says “God disciplines those he loves”!!And trust me our God is hurt to see us be disciplined the hard way, because he loves us. When we as earthly parents love our children so much how much more does our heavenly father!
Its my prayer this morning that – I will let my life be given to the will of God, I’m not perfect I may be crying for something God is not pleased about. But I’m willing to be disciplined by an all knowing Father who loves me.
1. Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way! Thou art the Potter, I am the clay. Mold me and make me after Thy will, While I am waiting, yielded and still. 2. Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way! Search me and try me, Master, today! Whiter than snow, Lord, was me just now, As in Thy presence humbly I bow. 3. Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way! Wounded and weary, help me I pray! Power all power surely is Thine! Touch me and heal me, Savior divine! 4. Have Thine own way, Lord! Have Thine own way! Hold o'er my being absolute sway! Fill with Thy Spirit till all shall see Christ only, always, living in me!