Ending where I began ???

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On the penultimate day of the year 2014, I decided I would blog on the reflections of the year gone by. And I’m just lucky I got a cue to get this post written with what happened just a few hours ago..

I waved goodbye to my husband as he rushed to work, with my sleepy eyes I tried to sleep again after he left beside my daughter sleeping  peacefully. However there were many things pending on my to-do list. I had some office work which was pending, So I decided to eat the frog first and I sat with my laptop at 8:30 to finish my presentation! I had to finish this work by 10, since my husband had asked me to pay some insurance by 10:00 AM.. I dint know how time flew by, it was 11:00 AM and I just finished my work and my daughter was still sleeping soundly. I hurried my daughter to get up and have her breakfast, however cannot expect a three and half year old to pace up to my speed!

We reached my mom’s house for breakfast at 11:45 AM and decided to have brunch instead of the cold dosa’s. I took 15 mins to eat, I started feeding my daughter at 12:00 PM and she wouldn’t finish until 1:00 PM.  Through that one hour, I was completely frustrated, annoyed, upset with myself and then yelling at my daughter that she couldn’t eat faster. I was planning to leave her with my mom and go pay the insurance, however my daughter would never let me go. I was again upset that she never let me go, and that the office would close for lunch and I would not be able to do what I promised to do!

Nevertheless at 1:10 PM I reached the office, clueless where I need to go and the board said that they break for lunch at 1:15 and that broke my heart as well. While I was standing in a queue trying my luck, one lady looked at my daughter and recognized her, because yesterday she was with my husband standing at the counter for hours but the server was down and hence the payment was not done.  The lady was kind enough to call out to me, and asked me to get inside and make my payment inside and not wait outside because it was closing time!!! Wow that’s a miracle now (A treatment not expected from Public sector organizations)!

Awww it was such a relief, that I could pay the insurance in a matter of few minutes without waiting just because the lady recognized my daughter! Though I was happy thatthe work was done, it made me feel guilty that I had just yelled and shouted at my daughter for the last one hour just because she was not allowing me to go without her and she was delaying! Infact if I had come without her, I would have not been recognized and I would have stood in the queue for hours in vain!

This incident sums up my year!!!

All through the year situations, circumstances and people around were not right from my point of view(I may be wrong sometimes)! I was frustrated, annoyed sometimes, wild and angry a few times and unhappy sometimes with myself and sometimes with others. Despite my shortcomings I thank God for His GRACE which was ABUNDANT, there were so many miracles, so many blessings to count this year, however, there is much I’ve learnt (from mistakes mostly) which needs to be action-ed! There is a lot of difference in knowing and doing and 2014 helps me see that even clearly!

My husband says it often “Its all in the mind” and its very true!! People are distinguished not by their situations, circumstance nor things nor people around them, its by their disposition (a person’s inherent qualities of mind and character)

I have been unable to maintain a calm mind, a positive mind, through ups and down in the last year uptil today’s smallest of small incident! This is a major learning I need to ACTION into 2015 to have a calm mind, a peaceful mind, and above all to wait on the Lord and Trust that he is holding my hand and leading me through paths unknown!

If you read my post when I began this year you will understand my title 🙂 The only difference is when I began 2014, I was still in the process of Knowing, I believe and trust that 2015 will be a year of DOING and not just KNOWING 😉

Wishing you all a prosperous, brighter, wiser new year 2015 🙂

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6 comments

  1. Thank you for sharing this insightful post. It’s so true that God tries to teach us the same lessons over and over again, and we are so slow to learn them! I struggle with these repeat sins, too. They often have to do with lack of self-control, and lack of trust in God. I’m right there with you, trying to make this a year of doing and not just knowing! God bless you this year, friend!

  2. Thanks dear Lindsey and very happy New year to u and your family… 🙂 Waiting for your post to know your updates on your place change….

    Lack of self control is something i’m working for years with no progress at all.. sometimes i fail so badly that i feel miserable…. But God never gives up on me…. he keeps molding me 🙂

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